DEAR SON

Dear Leo,

Honorable men are all built the same so I’ll raise you to be an honorable man. I’ll teach you that respect is not given, it’s earned so I hope you never raise your voice or instill fear in a bid to earn respect. I hope you know that you will always find home in me so whenever you feel a little overwhelmed by the weight of the world, may you find your path back to me and I will sit with you, wrap my arms around you and let you soak in the warmth of my love. I hope you understand that every new dawn is an opportunity to make things right so I hope you learn how to forgive yourself, it’s the hardest thing, but it’s an art, you learn it. I will probably not have figured out this thing called motherhood but I hope not just to be your mother but your best friend, so I’ll be there when you freak out because you can’t say hello to that pretty girl in class. And I’ll help you pick out the prettiest bouquet to give her on Valentine’s day.

I promise to be present for each and every one of your birthdays, even when you hit third floor, you’ll still be my little boy. Don’t worry, I won’t be one of those parents who give long boring speeches and crack lame jokes, I’ll just sit on the front row and cheer you on, so may I be held accountable when you read this on your 16th birthday. You’ll grow up, become a teenager and you’ll hate how I infringe your space but that’s what mothers do, they do your grocery shopping even when you think it’s lame. They are guardians and they protect their little ones with everything they have. I hope you find your space in the universe, I hope your find your voice and when you do, fill the silence.

I hope you understand that the best was to find love is to let love find you and when you do find true love, hold onto it, son, it is rare. I hope you know that I will always carry you in my heart so when you do things that you are not proud of, I hope you know that you can always find a confidant and a friend in me. You’ll get older and follow a different path but I hope that you always remember that mine is a love you will never have to doubt. But don’t worry I’ll do a brilliant job in engraving that in your heart. I’ll read you bedtime stories and watch you fall asleep in my arms and I sit there just watching you breathe and marvel at the beautiful gift the universe handed me.

Whenever sadness consumes you and I’m probably on the other side of the universe, may the letters that I write you keep you warm, may you hear my voice repeatedly in your head and know that my heart is big enough to give you all the love you need. And when I’m old and shriveled and can’t remember who you are, read me these letters and they will bring me back to you. I love you son, I have loved you way before I even met you.

Love Mom.