It is your first time going to South B. you remember hearing the matatus are in Bus Station and not Railways or Ngara. You see, you’re kinda new to Nairobi or the CBD. After looking at many boards, noting the spelling mistakes, realizing black and read are a favourite, you spot the South B board and matatu. *I know many boards have the fare clearly written. For the sake of this story, all matatus don’t plaster the fare*. You get in as the ‘first true’ passenger. Fast forward, it is time to pay fare. You are clueless. Deciding on the note, you pay. The note wasn’t picked by choice. You believe the fare can’t be any more than what you gave and the balance will inform you of the cost. See, you didn’t ask anyone and the conductor has been giving other passengers balance. You get your 60 bob balance and are a tad wiser.
Consider this too: You have been getting some weird rashes and small swellings on your body. Telling a doctor in the family, she suggests that it might be an allergic reaction and throws way some food names that might be the source. You make a mental note and become observant of your body when you eat any of the foods. One day, you crack the code.
Last consideration. I hope… HA!There is a step just before you enter your home. You can navigate it when the lights are off, on, when running, without looking, when crawling.
What am I getting at? Awareness. Knowing a fact. Kujua. Kupelekwa na rieng or is it mutaratara. There is so much to know out here. What I would like you to focus on as you read is knowing yourself. Being aware of who you are, what’s in your heart what’s on your mind, your behaviours, likes, dislikes, feelings, preferences, beliefs, experiences. Everything!
Being aware that crowds make you nervous; talking to girls make you stutter; being around people makes you feel energized. Being aware that you have a passion in something or you really don’t like the course you’re pursuing or you really love your job. Being aware that if you don’t note stuff down, you’ll forget. Be aware when you are prepared for that exam or when you aren’t. Being aware that you can’t have casual sex without catching feelings.. Knowing that you can’t watch a graphic film without having nightmares. Knowing that you can’t stop at five shots of vodka without drinking more and more until you get stupidly drunk. Knowing that you can’t sit still when a mad tune is playing.
Knowing when you start to change. When things take a different course. Being aware that you’ve been eating more or your leg is painful when you walk. Being aware that you’ve been sleeping a lot or haven’t been sleeping well for the past week. Becoming aware that you keep on thinking of a particular thing a lot, something is always on your mind. Being aware that what happened to you still disturbs you somehow even when you try not thinking about it. Being aware that you’ve been: drinking more, smoking more, going out more or even less. Being aware that you are crying more of late, or you seem irritated or just feel very angry and snap at people for no reason. Being aware that you feel happier; you like that guy; you feel so motivated; you sing more. Being aware that you don’t write as much; sing as much; play as much; draw as much or now you do it more!
All my three illustrations depict the impact of awareness. It can be considered as knowledge too. There is so much to learn about this world and there is so much to learn about ourselves. Being aware of ourselves aids navigate life. We grow; adapt and change; which makes the quest for self-awareness an unending one. A good place to start is likes, dislikes, SWOT analysis and personality types. There are the four personality types, the 16 one, enneagram and many others. We do not fit in just one and these types help us understand ourselves better, know why we may do it like that and why we are the way we are.
Our parents or people who brought us up or even friends know a great deal about us in addition to knowing themselves. That said, only you can be your own expert. Know yourself more than anyone can. Because you breathe for you and live in your skin alone.
Whatever you do with the information is entirely up to you and be aware that awareness will affect your decision making.
Become aware of who lives under your skin.
Kness
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