Dearest dad,
I am not quite sure if l should call you that
Maybe casually saying Bennie works
I’d like us to have a talk
Not as Royalty and Bennie but father-daughter
My fragile heart bleeds because of you.
I begged for you to stay
Without caring you chose them
I’m mad you didn’t love me enough
Madder since my pen never ran dry writing to you
Maddest because you don’t know how damaged I am.
Your girl is the queen of insecurities
Trust issues has become her second name
I relive the hell you took us through
Death won over mum
It nearly has me by the neck
Hope you get that vivid picture
Here is what you did to her, I mean us
Every day you came drank and vented your volcano anger
Shamelessly you beat her helpless to the floor
Her mistakes you never disclosed
Horrid memories of your doings haunt me to death
I grew up with a depressed, narcissistic mother
Dad you’re the reason I have failed relationships
People say I’m looking for a dad in them
You broke me into million little pieces
I’m at crossroads as I jot this down
Hope in the silence of your thoughts you’ll hear my cry
And hopefully…
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