Someone Was Loved

In that moment, everything stills,
An evening so calm holds a shift,
One that will forever haunt us all,
But none more than the eleven blank spaces,
As the sounds of broken hearts are heard again,
And this time, there is no running from it,
There is no forgetting, or escaping anymore,
This time, there is only pain, and boy does it hurt.

As the winds blow, and the rains hit hard,
The rivers flow in reverse, pleading,
An obvious desperation to make it all stop,
To make it a hallucination in the foggy evening,
But nothing works, as helpless tears blend in,
Turning that season into a cruel reality,
A stricken chance with a faulty forever,
Forcing blank spaces on families that hoped.

The confusion is quick in the air,
While numbers are pressed hopefully,
And fingers crossed a little too hard,
With knees folded on the dusty floors,
Waiting so desperately for answers,
Answers that might never really come,
Answers whose meanings get lost in the hurt,
And when the dial tone is heard, it crashes.

In the distance are hearts so scared,
Beating frantically at an unacceptable reality,
Alone on a road marred by pain and anger,
Life and loss clash, while love weeps loudly,
At the horror staring back at it proudly,
The stench of denial thickens so fast,
The whirring sound of hope is barely heard,
And then it sinks in, a reality so unexpected.

Nothing is ever going to be the same,
Everything is suddenly so wrong,
The once-smiling hearts are broken,
The once-excited chats on the bus, gone,
The once-happy students silenced so harshly,
All of it just fades in slow silence, all gone,
Left in its place, is a pain that never leaves,
Eleven empty spaces that will never be filled.

Goodbyes that never meant forever surface,
And everyone is thrown into sudden mourning,
Hearts clench painfully for those who hoped,
The eleven hearts that dreamed but were shut up,
The survivors’ guilt makes itself known,
And everyone tries to find an explanation,
Despite knowing it’s never going to be enough,
As long as some hearts will never beat again.

Memories are harshly forced to light,
And with them, bright smiles that once were,
Names are mentioned in memoriam,
For the students that slept that evening,
In the hope that they get to rest in peace,
When it hurts so bad the psych ward calls,
But then all that is left, is a hell on its own,
One that shamelessly screws the broken hearts.