A Thousand Years With You

It was different, with her, the girl in a red scarf,
The girl whose smile tore through my heart,
Whose life was never hers, to begin with,
The girl who had endured life and all its shit,
The girl who had stayed when she didn’t need to,
The girl in a long ponytail who loved me first,
The girl who had learned everything for me,
And the girl who owned my heart at the end.

She was different, but in a kinder way,
Her heart was one that beat for everyone,
A heart that only ever knew to love.,
A heart that had been boron too many times,
And yet even in the broken state,
It was a heart that had made me want to live,
Despite the countless times I had long wishes,
Hers was the love that stayed and loved.

Starin at her down on her bruised knees then,
Helplessly fighting for that which was hers,
Or maybe it was ours and I didn’t know,
While her tears fell down her pretty face,
And her cries filled the empty mid-day sky,
I knew she was the one I wanted to live for,
The one who made me a different person,
And perhaps it was twisted, but I loved her.

She was always bright when I saw her,
Always having a reason to laugh,
Always embracing life like it was everything,
She knew how important it all was then,
Despite the fact that I was trying to shield her,
From the things I knew would break her heart,
But then my darkness was a proud sin,
One that dared to ruin her eventually.

She should have hated me, anyone would’ve,
But instead, she rushed in my direction,
Still with determined but tear-stained eyes,
Ready to tag along with me on a long journey,
One that went too deep into the unknown,
One that got lost in my cruel world,
Yet one that had decided to stay with me.

This should have been a love letter,
And perhaps it is, one from the heart,
But time has passed since that fateful day,
And I lost the girl I had wanted so badly,
Because I was too selfish to have her with me,
Because I needed her to live her life,
To be her own light and to shine brighter,
Maybe someday she will read this; just maybe.