Make Hay Until The Darkness Comes

Truthfully,
I have been lying to myself every day,
Ever since the day I knew what lying was.

I am not anything special,
I will never be, this is my reality,
Sad, it may sound, but it’s the truth,
It was painted into my head so well,
I’ll be a fool to forget.

I tried to live,
By the rules and expectations placed on me,
But I don’t even know who made these rules, lol.
It sucks.
I hate it here.

Growing up,
All I heard was “make hay while the sun shines”
Excuse me, but I might die of heat
While making this hay,
This is not fun for me.

No one sees my effort anyways,
So I’ll just take my time,
And make hay until darkness swallows the light.
At least, I will be truthful to myself this way.