AT THE END

At the end,

When you look down and stare at wrinkly hands

When your eyes don’t work as well as they used to

When all that is left is a tuft of white cloudy hair on your head

And ghosts of those long departed

Call unto you sweetly, softly

Beckoning you to go to them and to let go of all that is worldly

The clock is about to strike midnight

And you know…

… you know your time is almost up,

Will you look back 

Stare at the story you’ve written

For some 70, 80 something odd years

And say… 

Wow…what a tale

Or will a tear slide down…

Sad

Cold

Chilling as the regrets that keep you company

Slowly eating away what little is left of your soul… 

Will the shadows of your sunset scratch and claw at you?

Or will they accept you gently, softly as a long lost lover?

Will thoughts of a time lost so long ago

Fill you with pain?

Pain of opportunities not taken

Pain of chances lost,

Pain of choices not made

Pain of a love lost or a love never found

Pain of a risk not taken

And the pain of regrets and what ifs… 

Or will those thoughts bring a soft smile to your face

As you remember all the opportunities you had

The chances that were taken

The choices that were made… 

Those you loved… and those who broke your heart

The risks you took?

Will those thoughts that flitter and dance as mist in the wind

Remind you of the bad, the worse and the downright horrible?

Or will they remind you of the good and the great?

The lessons learned, 

The fortitude gained from all the pain, the sorrow and suffering

That we as human beings often go through?

Will you look at them as experiences that made you stronger?

Made you wiser

Made you better

Made you more willing to cherish this life

Or will you see these experiences as phantoms

Sent to break you 

Sent to wound you

Sent to make you hurt and bleed till there’s nothing left 

Sent to make you feel worthless and incapable

To leave you filled with shame and regrets? 

 

 The clock ticks midnight….

Tis time for the curtain call

Tme for the reckoning. 

And as you wander along memories… both yours and not

The new, the old and the ancient, 

Can you look back and say…

I have loved and I have lost

I have hurt and I have been hurt

I have made bad choices and mistakes

I have oft drunk from the river of pain 

I have unwillingly waltzed with suffering 

I have learnt lessons from the harsh teacher that is life

I have made peace with my demons and phantoms

I have accepted all that was and all that could never be 

And I have made peace…with my regrets

At the end, 

As you stand not in the now yet not in the past,

Can say with pride… 

This was my life?

 

 

©Gihihi?