HELP ME

I need help, not judgement

For too long i have been abusing

Honestly i don’t even know how it started

We all know it started with a sip and a puff

But i don’t understand how i got myself tangled in abusing

All i know is one day i woke up

My thoughts were too heavy

My head had too much

So i needed something that could make my head lighter

Then i found my new place of solace

I immediately made it a daily habit

When i used, i felt numb

Its like all my problems were swept way

Sad reality that many don’t know is that

Every morning, i land back to reality

Which is always a nightmare because i have to face my demons yet again

So i dive back to them

My consolation

The only true friends i know

Because when i have them in my system, they make me feel safe, which we all know its in disguise

Of course a part of me wants to quit

I just don’t know how to

So don’t judge me

Instead help me