I FELL FOR MY NIGHTMARE

She said she’d stay, and I believed her,
Not because I trusted her,
Not because I loved her too much,
Not because I wanted a better life,
Not because she was all I had then,
Not because it felt right,
But I believed her words,
Because they gave me the thing I never had,
Something I spent my life hating,
Something I’d avoided like a plague,
Something I thought I never needed,
Something my being required,
She gave me hope,
And that’s how I ended up in pieces.

I never thought I’d ever meet her,
Let alone be part of her clan,
But I did meet her that day,
When the sun was burning through my skin,
And the winds fighting to cool it all,
When the rains threatened to pour,
And the clouds watching in amazement,
A day that should have been cast away,
But one she’d held onto for so long,
Maybe that’s what got me to her,
Maybe that’s what attracted me to her,
Maybe, just maybe that was the reason,
She smiled so brightly at me,
Like a trophy, she’d yearned for her whole life.

I shouldn’t have stayed,
I should’ve left at hello,
I should’ve been a stranger,
Stiff and stern I should have been,
I should’ve been the unreachable,
The untouched and maybe the tainted,
But how could I do that,
When her full lips tempted my sanity,
When her beautiful nose called for my finger,
When her cheeks got my palms itching,
When her brown eyes showed me my world,
And when her hair swept my strong-will away,
How could I when our souls matched in an instant,
And even when my heart and brain were at war?

I made a choice that cost me my peace,
I fell in love with my kind of trouble,
I fell in love with the hate in her eyes,
I fell in love with the anger in her veins,
I fell in love with her rotten personality,
I fell in love with my own doom,
I fell in love and it should’ve hurt,
It should’ve been a warning,
But all the indicators were destroyed at hello,
A mistake I should’ve corrected sooner,
But karma and Mi’lady were best friends,
So I got to receive the best of the worst,
A class I’d never attend again in a long while,
I fell in love with my nightmare.