A FOOL I WAS

Anguish burning down my soul cannot let me have a glimpse of you one more time. I was a fool. I was full of myself. I let your mendacious ways control every nook and hook of my nectar like discipline and now am stuck between my old self and the monster you cunningly made me to be.

I was a fool that I looked and saw you in different way. How could I forget the teachings of my grandma? The only person who has had a pure intention of loving me. Unlike you, I became as rag. I became a doormat to step on . I became your dust reliever. And even a times, you wiped all your dirt and mad using me.

I was a fool. And honestly, I regret everything just now. Why though? Why did you add more thorns on the painful crown that I was already bearing? Were you happy seeing me bleed and loosing it all for you? Why though? Then again, I was a fool not to realise that the color of my blood was red. And that was a red flag which could not be blown by any wind. Stuck too deeply nobody opinions mattered. Placed in such a fix. They say red is a sign of danger; and in a way, I agree. We don’t bleed unless we’ve been hurt. Hurt by those whose hearts have no hats to curb the heat around.
Why did I became so invaluable to you that you saw me that way? Long as I remember, I was your pie. I was your love. Sometimes you’d tell me I’m your life. Your breathe. I wonder how you’re still surviving yet you have no ‘your life and breathe’ no more. Oh! I think I know. I was a fool.

You used to tell me that your daddy told you never to ever raise hands on a woman. To respect women as it’s through a woman that you are in existence. But no, he only told you. He dint teach you. In a way, you got fooled. Why did you pour all your bitterness in me? Pounded me and tore me with your anger and left me with marks both inside and outside? Wait. Is it because I didn’t have karmasutra memorized? She gave you better , she had you better, she set for you better. You said. It was a bitter pill to swallow when you said those words to me. I felt like burning yet not being exhausted. I think it’s a common feeling among fools.

Where is she right now? Why are you running back to me asking for help after all you did? Have you just remembered that you left your life behind? Why are you roaming in thoughts and distress? Is that not what you wanted? You choose different, you left genuine. Now you’re not the charm I knew anymore. You’re not my type anymore. You’re not my person anymore. After all, fools don’t help. They only make things worse. And your time is here, for you to hear your inner demons and outside world torture you till you can’t take in no more. Eventually, you’ll know the real meaning of wisdom. It’s a fool world. We only learn from the best. Don’t we?

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